I Believe I Ordered The "Large" Cappuccino

I like to think I have a sophisticated (yet picky) palate. I ate at this newly discovered restaurant two nights in a row, so I thought I’d recommend it to all diners out there.

Bruschetteria
92 Rivington (between Ludlow and Orchard)
NY, NY 10002

This quaint, quiet and reasonably-priced place is just deeeeelicious and I can’t think of anything wrong with it (aside from the plastic folding chairs you have to sit on if you aren’t swift enough to grab the booth side first). The menu states that most fat and uncultured Americans pronounce “bruschetta” all wrong. The menu corrects this problem and spells the word out phonetically: broo-skeh-tah. Who would’ve known? I feel a little bit smarter now and a little bit less déclassé.

For starters, we ordered the olive tapendade, proscuitto and something-else-I-can’t-recall bruschetta. The chefs are even kind enough to spread the stuff out evenly for you on toasted bread. We also ordered fontina cheese and caramelized onion bruschetta, which was a little too mild for my taste, but still good.

Although I’m not a vegetarian, I adore veggies and this place’s arugula-celery-pignoli-mushrooms-parmigiano-cheese-lemon-and-olive-oil salad is soooo good! Arugula has that naturally salty taste, which I just love. (At the supermarket, I’ve noticed it’s kinda pricey, but this salad was a mere $8.00—what a steal!)

First night, we skipped dessert. Probably because it was almost midnight and the waiters seemed to want to go home. The second night was different (like Passover!). We ordered the warm brownie and the mascarpone and honey bruschetta. I nearly wet myself when I tasted the brownie. The warm brownie was so delicious and so warm, it tasted like Ms. Hines made it herself. (She didn’t, the Mexican chefs did. The kitchen is right in the front of the restaurant, and all it consists of is a tiny stove, microwave and some other stuff. This place is teeny. And it’s also right next to Moby’s tea place Teeny. And next to a ladies-oriented sex shop.) The sweet bruschetta tasted just like that FAGE Greek yogurt and honey snack I love.

Side note: the bathroom in this place is remarkably sparkling-- it was like they doused it with bleach. It was even pretty. I don’t give a shit about a clean bathroom, but this was just so spic-and-span, I had to mention it.

The bill for two was $47.00. Pretty reasonable for a three course meal. And the coffees are served in huge mugs and cost only $1 each, which is unheard of (outside of your local gross Madaba deli.)

Final note: this place has a very nice crowd. We even struck up a convo with the young couple sitting next to us. It’s also free of those stupid-too-cool-for-school-tragically-hip-scarf-wearing-limited-edition-sneaker-wearing-I-will-only-listen-to-unheard-of-music-I-try-to-look-different-but-really-only-look-like-everyone-else-now peeps that make me cringe.

Now eat at this restaurant so I can say, “I told you so.”

First Post

Neat! This is my first official post. I guess I feel interesting enough to blog about myself for all to see/read. How pretentious of me.

Just to clarify: I'm neither Russian or a ballerina. (Okay, I have a little Russian blood in me and I took ballet for years as a kid). But sometimes, don't we all just feel like a dainy Russian ballerina living in the 19th century who wants to throw her poor little body on lively train tracks?

But really, most of the time I don't feel like that and I just thought it would be a nifty name for this blog. Seriously.

Ta-da!